Wedding Etiquette for a Grandmother

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While the grandmother is typically not expected to actively participate in the wedding planning, she plays an important role as one of the oldest female relatives. In turn, the grandmother is expected to show proper etiquette at the wedding.

Your grandchild is getting married!

Do you feel as excited as when it was your son or daughter getting married? Surely, you are anticipating the big day as much as everyone else – especially if your grandson or granddaughter is very close to you. And in the whirlwind of preparations and pre- wedding events, it is easy to get lost. Here’s a quick wedding etiquette guide for grandmothers to help you get through the wedding excitement.

Wedding Etiquette for Grandmothers

  • The Dress Question – Choose your dress based on the formality of the wedding. Wear something flattering and comfortable based on the venue, time and month. Avoid colors that are too close or matches the bride’s or her bridesmaids’ dresses. If the wedding is semi- formal, a pantsuit or casual dress will be appropriate. If the wedding is formal, choose a skirt suit or an elegant dress.
  • Offer Advice – If the bride (and / or groom) seeks your advice, don’t hesitate to give it. You are considered the ‘wise one’ and they will rely on you to help them with some traditional wedding etiquette advise. Just be mindful not to push your way around the planning. Be sensitive of what the couple wants.
  • Something old, something borrowed – Offer the bride something that she can use as her something old or something borrowed from her big day. It can be a pair of earrings, a brooch that she can use on her bouquet, a religious item, a silk handkerchief, or even your own wedding gown or veil!
  • On the big day – Traditional wedding etiquette says that the grandparents should be ushered down the aisle at the beginning of the ceremony. You may also be asked to wear a corsage or carry a small bouquet. Some couples also include their grandparents in the receiving line at the reception, especially if they are very close with their grandparents or grew up with or around them.
  • Gifts – It is customary for grandparents to give a gift to the couple on their wedding day. However, there are really no rules on what type of gift to give. Depending on how close you are to your grandchild, you can give something personal, something vintage from your own collection, or even cash to help the new couple start their new life together.
  • Socials – Remember to socialize at the party, if you can! Talk to the wedding party, get to know your new extended family and your grandchild’s friends. Take lots of photos and get on the dance floor!

The wedding will surely be something to remember for everyone, including you.

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